The stressing part of burning man is over for me. I got the car all loaded and i’m on my way, caravaning with Kj aka ohmigod on the playa. We’re in a rest stop on the spooky desert route.

I learned a lot in my three day burn prep.

1. I have my stuff together and I have too much stuff. I did pare down quite a bit. It’s empowering to throw stuff out.

2. You can never have too much stuff. Harbor frieght is awesome! There are a few locations and it is a great source for inexpensive tools and supplies. Mini bullhorn: $10. Nuff said.

3. Ozzie Dots on Hollywood is the best costume in la. They really cater to the burner crowd. Don’t hesitate to ask the staff for help. They know why you’re there.

4. Lowe’s outshines home depot 10 times out of 10.

5. Uniformity of bins is a good thing. It makes for a flat surface to work on when packing.

6. Packing is way more fun with a friend or two. Thanks Nati and Sarah!

7. The call to become a were tarantula will be unmistakable. Everywhere I an delighted by spiders. I’m loving the huge new campmate we just got. Costco us awesome for me for that last minute perfect thing.

8. I can’t wait for my friends to get to the playa!

9. Packing for 13 days on the playa and 13 days in Denver are very different endeavors. Now to try and keep some clothes clean.

10. Sometimes, you see amazing art cars when you aren’t even at burning man.

I realized as I posted yesterday about what to bring to the burn, I mentioned toolkits. What would go in such a thing you ask. It’s going to be different for every person. For me, and I will be out there for a while and I a total tool whore. 

Basics:

• screwdriver (phillips and standard)
• crescent wrench (for bikes)
• bike multi-tool
• tube repair kit
• Hammer
• Sledge hammer
• A good knife or matte knife (or both)
• Channel locks and/or vice grips (for pulling out stakes)
• Work Gloves (you will want them on as soon as you get to the playa and start setting up camp)
• Leatherman, Gerber or other multi-tool
• Wire cutters (dikes) and needle-nose pliers
• Scissors
• Duct Tape
• electrical tape
• Zip ties
• bailing wire
• small shovel
• extra flashlight (I keep flashlights stowed everywhere.)
• at least 50′ of rope and 50′ of sash (cotton laundry rope, essentially)
• superglue (also good for bad cuts. I’m just sayin’)
• sewing kit
• wd40 & silicone lubricant (the silicone is for your tent zipper)
• gun lighter
• hex kit

So, as soon as I get home, i really gotta  pack up the ol’ element and get going to the Playa. I have 2 days. So I figured I’d dig up the Less Than Zero Expectations what to bring list.  It has been modified for the American Dream.  This list has been gathered from friends and changed so many times, who knows where it came from. Catherine and Wizard definitely get the lion’s share of credit. 

Bring: 

• BURNING MAN TICKET!!! (or confirmation email printout for will call)
• Early Arrival Pass (if you got it)
• Extra Car Keys 
• Cash (once you’re there, you’ll only buy ice, coffee or use it as an illegal bartering medium) 
• Ice for road trip 
• Jumper Cables 
• WATER!!! (BUY IN RENO – you’ll save your car a lot of weight. It’s recommended 1.5 gallons/day per person for drinking/food/showers This is good advice with current gas prices) 
• Food (see list below) 
• Alcohol (pick a budget and stick to it)

 Bike Stuff:

• Bicycle (Decorated! – It’s prettier and less likely to be stolen) 
• Bike Rack 
• Bike Light (it can be DARK) 
• Bike Lock (combo best so you don’t have to hold keys!) 
• Tire Repair Kit
• wd40 
• bike multi-tool

Camping:

• Tent 
• Heavy Duty Tent Stakes (Long, at least 12″ although heavy rebar will work well too) 
• Shade structure (I have a carport I got at pep boys years ago. It’s survived pretty well and I use shade cloth on the sides to make it even better. I curse it every time I put it together.) 
• Sleeping Bag or Linens 
• Pillow 
• Air Mattress or futon
• 2 Camping Chairs so you can have company  
• Camping Table 
• Lantern 
• Camping Shower (cabellas.com has the best one)
• Tool Kit  (for me this is a lot)
• Rope/line (as a grip I can say, you can never have enough out there)
• Small Broom/Dust Pan (sweeping your tent)
• Water Bottle with Strap, clean canteen on a carabiner or a Camelback (sold at REI- usually,on sale in August) 
• An extra cup or two!

• Clothing for Warm and Cold Weather (always prepare for extremes)
• Boots 
• Close-Toe Shoes (at least some of the time – and make sure they can get dirty) 
• EXTRA SOCKS!!! (Seriously, at least DOUBLE what you think) 
• EXTRA UNDIES! (you may loose some) 

• Headlight/Flashlight 
• Tiny Flashlight (to hook on you for night walking) 
• Extra Batteries (all kinds – camera, lantern, flashlight, boom box, etc.)  
• Blindfold (for day sleeping) 
• Earplugs 
• Duct Tape 
• Sunscreen 
• Lip Screen/Balm with sunscreen!
• Hat 
• Sunglasses 
• Goggles (for dust storms) 
• Bandana for Dust Mask (THESE ARE GREAT CAUSE YOU CAN FOLD THEM UP) 
• Umbrella 
• Rain Coat or Poncho 
• Zip Lock Bags (lots of the ‘storage’ size) 
• Garbage Bags (i suggest contractor bags or trash compactor bags. the last thing you want on your return home is a leaky trashbag stinking up your drive) 
• Plastic Grocery Bags 
• a cardboard box for burnables
• First Aid Kit 
• Matches / lighters
• Soft Kleenex 
• Sewing Kit 
• Safety Pins 
• Paper Towels 
• Moisturizing Eye Drops 
• Nose Saline (they have this at 99 cent store) 
• Baby Wipes (great to carry around in a plastic baggie & to take showers with!) 
• Q-tips (to clean ears from dust) 
• Medication (allergy, migraine, Echinacea, birth control, vitamins, etc.) 
• Oil (for hair- great treatment!You can get very dry out there. be sure for hair- some are toxic in high dose) 
• Lotion (Big) 
• Nail Polish Remover 
• Sponges 
• Shampoo/Liquid Soap (dr bonners!)
• Shower Puff (the plastic ball kind that dry quickly) 
• Towels 
• Toothbrush/Toothpaste/Floss 
• Can Opener- Eureka!!! 
• Swiss Army Knife/Corkscrew 
• Fire Extinguisher (There should at least be one close by) 
• Spray Bottles (2) one for your body one for cleaning dishes and pans!
• Vinegar 
• Basin 
• COSTUMES!!! (For various types of weather/temperature) 
• Body Makeup 
• Bright Nail Polish 
• Blinkies/Glow Sticks 
• Essential Oils (for smell-just nice) 
• Wigs 
• A bathroom bag (small backpack or sling bag) . contents: roll of single ply TP. flashlight, baby wipes, surface wipes, a ziplock for the used wipes, hand sanitizer basically anything you would need in the porta-potties. Keep it right by the door of your tent. so that in the middle of the night it’s close at hand! Trust me. This is a lifesaver!
• Kitchen set up plates, cups, utensils. Pots pans, knives spatulas, etc. 
• A butane stove. I got mine at a chinese supermarket in chinatown. 
• a solid cooler that will keep your drinks cold and the FEW things you need to keep cold for freshness fresh.
• one of those orange five gallon drinking water things. Keep this full of ice and use it to get your water cold. TIP: manage your coolers by keeping them in the shade!

FOOD 

• Water 
• Emergen-C or Gatorade (you’ll need the electrolytes!) 
• Nuts/Dried Fruit 
• juice
• Shakes 
• instant soups and asian food from Trader Joe’s. Think anything pre-made. just set them in the sun to cook!
• Oatmeal 
• Those tuna packs that make instant tuna salad
• Clif Bars 
• salty treats to help keep you hydrated
• Tasty Bites or similar food in a bag (get at trader joes) a real treat out there! 
• If you want to be super awesome. Get a great dish from your favorite take out restaurant and get a double order of something you love (like gumbo, or kung pao shrimp) and freeze it in a big ziplock. Then eat it in the first few days, just by heating it up in a big pan. 

Extra Tips
- Pack in plastic storage containers. Use bins to help stack your stuff!

- Pack clothes in categories in large zip lock bags. Keeps them less dusty. zip them back up when you can!

- Pack one clean set of clothes (including shoes and socks) for the ride home. Don’t open during BM. You’ll be happy! 

- Pack all of your undies & makeup in plastic baggies (so never too dusty) 

-You might want to add a mesh bag like the kind that onions come in. Put wet garbagein them ( like food waste) and then it dries out in the heat and can then be put in plastic bags for drive home. 

DO NOT BRING: 

• Excess Packaging – take cereal bag out of cereal box, etc. 
• Anything with feathers or loose glitter 
• Too much produce (especially watermelons! Never bring watermelon to burning man)
• Styrofoam Coolers

I’m testing the wordpress app for my iphone. Mainly because I haven’t had time to actually write on my lappy in what seems like forever!

There just doesn’t seem to be enough time, lately. I think part of of is this working five days a week business. It’s a real challenge. And really, there’s no end in sight. I work til Friday. Then on Monday I work then fly to Baltimore to work all week there. Then ny, ny by train. Then back to Baltimore. Then LA for a few days. Then drive to the playa, work for two weeks. Then fly out of brc to Denver for another 10 days. I’m booked absolutely solid until mid September!

And there is so much to do! And now. I have just taken on building ART for burning man! What am I thinking? But to be honest, the 8′ Voodoo Man Doll I am building excites the heck out of me! As Scotty and I discovered. The difference between a theme camp and an idea is a sign. We’re going to be camped at 430 and edsell. Exactly where we wanted!

Call me. I’m slammed right now. But call me, I could uses some love. I will warn you. It’s the zero expectations or less time of year. We’ll see what we can make happen!

And it looks like I’ll be able to blog from the playa!

So, apologies are in order. I got freaked out, I got sick and I got tired. That is what has happened to me for the last week. I apologize. I got lifed, pretty bad. 

But I am back! 

So here’s what’s up, in a nutshell. No, here’s what’s up in a top ten things I love about my life. 

1. Love and openness to it. It’s pretty sweet. I’m just in this really cool space about it. It’s the no attachment thing. Earlier in the week, I was a little down on myself, but a dinner with Wolfie gave me a good place to stand, and I am back in love with love.  

2. I got a Trogdor for my bike.  

Yeah. Pretty awesome. Now to get a red wrestling mask and boxing gloves. Oh, and a beefy arm or two for the side. 

3. Burning Man shopping is on. The consumining! What do I need now? Well for one, I need a good drag outfit for Ladies Night on the Playa. I’ve never gone drag, I’m a little intimidated and scared. So suggestions (real suggestions, paynie, you are not invited to contribute) are welcome.  Wow. I can’t believe I just invited that one in. 

4. I went to Clockwork Orange last weekend at the Cemetery Screenings.  I was deeply affected by it. More upset by it than the countless times I saw it in film school. It turns out, I have been desensitized to violence. And now, seeing that desensitization, I am disturbed. Also, just the fear and violence in that movie. Wow. An amazing piece of scifi, it read more like a poem than a movie. And like really good scifi, it wasn’t about the future at all. It was about the now of 1971 when it came out. The tragedy is that we still haven’t gotten it. 

The movie also inspired me. I want to write a contemporary scifi novel. Right away. I’d love to get a rough draft complete at the end of this crazy month. Maybe a longhand manuscript. It’s crazy, right? But I am compelled. 

5. I just took a job with The Do Lab for right after Burning Man. In fact, I am flying off of the Playa on Thursday before the Man Burns. I’ve never been out there that early and I have never left that early. But I will have been out there for two weeks. I also get to spend ten days in Denver! That is super exciting! I have some dear friends out in Denver! It’s a good choice. I think I have already found a ride out of BM, a subletter for my sweet canvas space tent, a ride home for some of my stuff and a possible driver for my car back to LA (although I am taking volunteers). 

6. Adventure. It seems like I am having adventures solid through september. My new mantra: I am answering The Call.

7.  My Element is getting fixed. I’m now driving a Jeep Liberty. At least it has utility. I was cruising in my parent’s Lexus for a few days. It’s a sweet car, but delicate. There is an adage in the film business. “It’s a rental, don’t be gentle.” My car should be ready by Tuesday. 

8.  The Burning Man Screen Saver! Get it. It’s getting me really excited. 

9. I’m going to the Circus Tomorrow! I can’t wait! I haven’t been this excited about the circus since my ninth birthday! 

10. New bedspread and sheets. It’s the simple things in life that give me the most joy.  Oh yes, and Scotty taught me how to use a surger the other day. We made my fur blanket. It matches my coat, and it will keep me warm on the playa!

So the other day, I mentioned my burning man guilt. I was pretty down on myself for not being at all sorted out. Scotty pointed out, that I should be acknowledged for the projects I decided NOT to do. I am not doing my live chicken improvised explosive devices, I am not building a cooler shaped like a chicken coop complete with live chicken sounds. I am not building an axe throwing range in the center of camp. I am not doing any art really at all… Yet.

But I got home last night to a packet from the Burning Man, LLC. They offered me a job! So I am working the event this year! It’s not at my full rate, but honestly, it’s being paid for things that I would have done for a free ticket last year, and if I am giving all I got, I may as well get paid something for my trouble. And I am getting a very early arrival, meaning I am cleared to arrive on the playa on the 16th of August. Depending on how long I stay, that is a good 16-18 days on playa. That’s a lot of time. Last year I think I was out there 12 days.

I may be the first face you see when you get to the Playa. I hope I am.

But that suddenly puts my prep period into high gear! I am working until 3 days before I leave. I don’t know where the time will come from. I may have to enlist Bridge’s help after all. And just like that I am already contemplating getting a sweet Costco carport and doing my shopping. I’m such a comfort camping whore. Who knows how I will set that thing up when I am the first person at my campsite for a week. And then, where is my campsite? I still have not gotten word from placement!

Okay, calm down, Spaceman. We have time.

On the upside of being out there early, maybe I will set up an axe range on my campsite if there’s nobody there to get chopped in half. And there is nothing quite like the playa before all the burners come and ruin it. Ah, the playa at dawn. Nothing better.

Priorities: This is for me.

New Crates. I want to have 5 crates that pack up more uniformly than the ones I have now. Once I get to the Playa I want to use them to raise up my futon. I could also build legs pretty simply. I like being off the ground in my tent. A piece of plywood cut to my bed size also is in order. The new crates should pack better as well.

Costumes: Voodoo. I need to start gathering my voodoo stuff and get some sweet costuming going.

Our camp. It looks like I am going to be out there early again. Maybe we just land grab again if we get crappy placement.

The Beacon. I need some help with this. I have these super bright aircraft lights that I want to wire to a beacon and mount on a pole. Create a way to find my camp in the middle of the night. Anyone got the skills?

A carport. I have this one that I hate, and it’s about time I get the super carport pad a la Earth and Tinkle. I can afford it, if it is my one major playa purchase this year.

A shower rig. This is always a concern. I like to shower out there. I also don’t like showering in a pile of mud. I gotta work something out that drains and suspends the shower and is reasonable. I am willing to buy this.

Bike. I was thinking about biting the bullet and getting a cruiser. But at this point, is that smart? Maybe I just wd40 my bike. See what I can do and ride it out. It’s been to 5 Burns. I should be green about it, eh? Green. Who am I kidding. Tough call.

A trip to REI is in my future. Just cause.

Live Blogging. I gotta be really dialed in with Spaceman23.com by the time I hit the playa. I want to be able to blog with pictures for the entire time I am on the playa, especially beforehand when everyone is wondering how the conditions are. I need to talk to Brian and Art about this.

It has been brought to my attention that there is this little festival coming up in 5-6 weeks called burning man. I hear it is this big old freak fest in the desert. And you are supposed to do art projects and participate and stuff.

Yeah. I’ve done nothing or very little yet to prepare.

I considered the Papa Chango Axe Throwing Range. I’m still considering it. But to be honest, a thrown axe is a pretty erratic projectile. It would be very dangerous. I know, you say, that’s part of the fun, but… It might mess up someone’s camp. And I don’t want to be the guy who has to tell people “you can’t camp here… this is in the axe flight path.” and then, have them camp there anyway and get all upset when I fling an axe into their playa booty-call. Besides, Baz and were tossing the ol’ axe around at Orange Kamp, and I split the handle. I gotta get that handled.

I think I am going to volunteer again at the box office. I gotta get in contact with Buck about building the Box with him this year. I think that wold be pretty sweet.

To be honest, I keep having this feeling like something is going to come up before Burning Man that is going to send me on this crazy adventure to some other far off land. It’s just a feeling. And I really want to be going this year! I want to dust off my old Eric America costume and head out on the playa.

The theme really excites me. The group I am camping with are awesome. I have no excuse. I should be in full on Burn Prep mode. I’m not. I think it’s some kind of burner guilt I am experiencing right now…

Well, I may as well put it off another night. Maybe I just need to start sitting down with campmates…